The Perfect Man

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I know, I know, two blog posts about guys in a row…kinda obnoxious, I get it. But I created this blog to basically say whatever’s on my mind and right now, this is what is.

Tonight, one of my best friends and I hung out and, as usual, we got onto the topic of guys and what we look for in them. I gotta say that my standards seem pretty simple with just one or two…”unusual” areas. It’s not like I need someone who’s gotta have blonde hair and green eyes or something like that; it’s more so that I need a guy who fits who I am. I refuse to change myself for someone, even a friend, because the number one rule in my Rule Book of Life  is to stay true to myself no matter what (trust me, I know how cliché that sounds).

Sure I may change, but change happens to everybody and it’s something out of our control.  If I find out that a guy who is a die-hard sports fanatic is my soul mate, there’s no way I’m going to forcefully change the way I look and think just for him. Who knows, maybe in three weeks, he wouldn’t be in my life anymore and I wouldn’t know what to do with myself. Would I go back to who I was before? Would I stay this new person? Or would I do some awkward combination of my real self and this weird-sports-fan-thing??

Since I’m almost a month away from being 16, I’ve kinda stepped back and thought about some of the”firsts” I’ve had so far through high school…First time behind the wheel: check. First time swimming in gym class: check. First time getting an A on a final: check. First kiss: blank. First boyfriend: blank. First love: blank.

What is “love” at this age anyway? Making out in the hall (which, by the way, is super gross. Nobody wants to see that on their way to class. Just sayin’)? Holding the door open for your boyfriend/girlfriend? Buying them little gifts? There’s not much we, as teenagers, can do that really show what “love” is. And I know some of you reading this have a significant other and are totally thinking, “That’s not true!! We’re in love!!” But think about it…are you REALLY in love? Or maybe it’s just the fake version of it…the kind that tricks you into thinking you’re in love so you make stupid decisions. That, my dear friends, is called lust.

Everyone’s interpretation of love is completely different. My version of it is when you know you can share anything with your significant other and feel comfortable knowing that they know your deepest secrets. It’s when you can be honest with each other and have faith in them to do the right thing. Of course there are physical aspects of it, too, like little kisses and such, but I think real love is more focused on how grounded that person makes you feel, how jealousy is nonexistent in the relationship, and how you can trust them. I feel like this takes time to develop between two people…it’s not like you wake up one morning when you’re 17 and think “Oh my God, I love them!!” No, it’s longer than that. I say real love never stops developing…it takes a whole lifetime until one can figure out what it really is.

Now, coming back from my mini tangent, let’s chat about the kind of guy I want in my life. I don’t plan on dating for a while (not ’till I’m in college because high school relationships just don’t make sense to me) but every girl has their dream guy, right?

I’m feelin’ kinda listy…let’s start with the physical attributes I’d prefer.

1. Tall. He seriously has to be taller than me or we might have some issues there.

2. A great smile…something that can instantly brighten my day.

3. Eyes that I can get lost in. The color doesn’t matter, but I love it when I can look into a guy’s eyes and feel like I’m drowning in them (in a good way, obviously).

4. Kinda muscular, but not obnoxiously. I want him to be fit, but I can’t stand guys who have bulging muscles. Ick. And I don’t want my boyfriend/husband to be skinnier than me because that’s just plain weird.

Time for the personality!

1. Smart enough that I can carry an intelligent conversation with him. It can’t be something like “avocados are green.” and it can’t be like “Did you know the reason that avocados are green is because the sugar content in them is so high that the molecules compact together and the light reflects off of their structures then bounces back to our eyes but only the green rays reach our pupils??” (And that is 100% made up…I have no idea why avocados are green.)

2. A gentleman. I don’t want to be with some rude guy who isn’t going to treat me like a lady!! I want my doors opened for me!

3. Kinda artsy. I’m not gonna lie, I find it really attractive when a guy has that little bit of creativity in him. Take Tom Hansen from (500) Days of Summer: He’s into architecture…that’s kinda really fantastic to me. And another thing that I like about Tom leads me to:

4. Sensitive and romantic. I think that’s so adorable when a guy can watch a chick flick and cry because it shows that he’s comfortable showing his soft side. Of course there are other reasons for guys to be sensitive, but romantic is kinda big, too. I don’t want a big, boring lump who just sits there expecting me to be all romantic! It’s his job to make me feel special, too.

5. A sense of humor. I don’t think I even need to elaborate on that one.

So ladies and ‘gents, don’t ever settle for less. If you do, you’ll never really know the true meaning of love.

That is unless some completely opposite person comes in and manages to sweep you off your feet.

Then you might have some figuring out to do.

S.M.

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